Highly Sensitive Child And Sleep:
5 Common Causes of Poor Sleep And What You Can Do About It ❤️
For highly sensitive children, sleep struggles often stem from a nervous system that is easily over-aroused.
By understanding the connection between their high sensitivity and their sleep challenges, you can take steps to help them find the rest they need.
Here are five common causes of poor sleep in highly sensitive children, along with actionable steps you can take to ease their difficulties.
1) THEIR BRAIN IS STUCK IN ‘READY TO REACT’ MODE
Highly sensitive children’s brains work overtime, making it difficult for them to settle down.
At bedtime, their brains are like supercomputers with too many tabs open, unable to shift into ‘rest mode.’
This overstimulation can manifest as agitation, anxiety, irritability, or even hyperactivity, all of which disrupt sleep.
What you can do:
There’s no quick fix once your child is overstimulated, but there are preventative steps you can take:
- Create a calming bedtime routine:
Extend the wind-down period before bed with relaxing, low-stimulation activities.
- Manage the household mood:
Stress and tension in the home can really keep your child in ‘high alert’ mode.
The overall mood of everyone in the household may be the biggest contributing factor. Consider seeking help if this relates and feels hard to shift alone.
- Dim the lights early:
Low lighting about two hours before bedtime can be a game-changer as it helps signal the body to prepare for sleep.
- Don’t let screens sabotage their melatonin production:
Most devices use blue light, which is a wavelength that has been proven to inhibit the chemical that’s responsible for sleepiness.
Avoid screens for at least 2 hours before bedtime so you’re not disrupting your child’s natural sleep-wake cycle.
- Allow them to share their thoughts:
Give your child space to offload any worries or experiences from the day.
This helps to clear their mental passages, making it easier for them to drift off.
-Encourage more downtime for creativity and calmness:
Ensuring your child has enough downtime during the day is one of the best ways to prevent overstimulation.
Think of it as recharging their internal battery - time away from sensory input like noise, people and brightness helps them replenish their energy.
- Promote ‘flow’ activities:
Encourage drawing, writing, or other quiet activities in the evening like puzzles or building with Lego.
These tasks help recharge their emotional and mental reserves, resulting in a mind that’s ready to rest, rather than one that’s on high alert.
- Avoid overscheduling:
Well-meaning parents may overbook activities, but for highly sensitive children, this can do more harm than good.
An overstimulated child is not one that will fall asleep easily.
Sleep deprivation is exhausting for both you and your child, but it doesn’t have to stay this way.
Book a free consultation with me today and let’s work together to create a calm and restful bedtime routine for your child.
2) UNMET SENSORY NEEDS
Highly Sensitive children may experience intense sensory challenges, and bedtime can trigger their nervous systems into hyper-arousal.
Night-time can be a minefield of triggers, including noise, light, heat, cold, the texture of bedding or even the smell of the laundry softner.
They’re not being fussy - these sensations are legitimately bothersome for them.
What you can do:
- Explore sensory triggers and solutions:
Work with your child to identify what triggers discomfort and what soothes them.
Collaborate in creating a routine and sleeping environment that will be more calming on their nervous system.
-Try sensory aids:
It can make the world of difference to identify a product that really calms their more delicate nervous system at the end of the day.
Some popular aids to try include white noise machines, weighted blankets, soft bedding, cooler mattresses, blackout blinds, ear plugs for kids, cuddly hot water bottles or even sensory swings for those that need repetitive movement to unwind.
You’re not alone in facing these challenges, and with over 20 years experience, I’m here to help.
Let’s chat about how my coaching can guide your highly sensitive child toward better sleep - and a happier life.
3) AN IMAGINATION THAT WON’T QUIT!
A vivid imagination is a gift, but at night, it can lead to fears and anxieties.
Many highly sensitive children struggle with night-time fears, such as intruders, supernatural beings, urban myths or even deep thoughts about death.
These themes can really keep them from falling asleep.
What you can do:
- Empower them to take control of their imagination:
Help your child understand that their powerful imagination is behind their fears. This realisation gives them control over the situation and helps them eventually manage or eliminate these thoughts.
- Confront fears before bed:
Encourage your child to draw or write about their fears, then destroy the paper as a symbolic way of saying, "I have control over this fear." This act helps them release the fear and relax before bed.
They need to see that THEY are the ones creating these images and thoughts. This means that, in time, they can absolutely be the ones to take control of and put a stop to them (please note that sometimes this might require some outside help.)
4) YOUR REACTIONS ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM
Bedtime can be the most challenging time of day for parents.
Throw in a child with a highly sensitive temperament, on top of your own sleep-deprivation, and it would test the patience of any saint!
However, your reactions can either help calm your child’s nervous system or exacerbate their struggle.
Whether they’re overly reliant on you to help settle them, won’t sleep alone or wake frequently, your reactions have a huge impact on their willingness and confidence to tackle the issue.
You have the power to either make your child feel unacceptable, powerless and insecure
…Or understood, powerful and supported.
What you can do:
- Watch YOUR reactions
This warrants an entire blog of its own, but as a starting point bring in lots of conscious awareness to how you are responding to them.
Ask yourself two key questions:
- ”Am I helping them to feel safer in their nervous system?”…
- ”Am I empowering them to overcome this?”
Finding the balance between being supportive without being overly passive or dismissive is crucial.
Acknowledge how your feelings can affect them - highly sensitive children are attuned to their parents' emotions, which can also massively impact their sleep.
- Cultivate curiosity:
Get curious about what’s keeping their mind active and their nervous system in over-arousal.
Understanding the root of this helps ease your frustration and can help you better guide them to relaxation.
Remember how hyper-perceptive they are to how YOU feel, which in turn brings potential to over-arouse them further.
Imagine peaceful and joyful evenings for your family and the bliss of knowing that your evening and nights are YOUR OWN again.
You shouldn’t have to battle any more with this, get started today by booking your FREE consultation - reserved for parents who are serious about transforming their child’s sleep.
5. MIND MONKEYS ARE KEEPING THEM AWAKE!
Highly Sensitive children often have strong emotional responses, making them more prone to negative self-talk or overthinking.
They may dwell on the events of the day, perceived injustices, or fears about upcoming situations. This ‘mind chatter’ can keep their brain over-aroused at bedtime.
What you can do:
- Help them process and switch off:
Encourage your child to talk, journal, or express their thoughts through art. This creative outlet can help them process their emotions and settle their mind before bed.
For younger children you can encourage role-play using toys to act things out.
- Teach them to turn off their thoughts:
Once they’ve worked through their thoughts, guide them to an ‘off switch.’ Offer calming alternatives, like listening to an audiobook or a guided meditation for kids.
Teaching them to consciously shift their focus can be a powerful tool in managing bedtime worries.
- Paediatric Hypnosis for Sleep
If your child continues to struggle with sleep despite your efforts, pediatric hypnosis may be a helpful option. Hypnotherapy can provide relaxation techniques and mental strategies to address anxieties and sleep issues.
- Invest in Coaching or Therapy
If your child’s anxieties or negative thought patterns persist, it might be time to seek professional help. With the right support, your child can overcome their fears, build a positive mindset, and improve their self-esteem.
For even more support, consider enrolling in my FREE parenting course
- Designed to help you better understand and nurture your highly sensitive child, this course covers essential techniques for improving your reactions and creating a calm, supportive environment.
- Together, we can help your child thrive both emotionally and mentally, creating lasting change in your household.
Looking For Support?
Sleep struggles are tough, and it’s often too much to handle on your own. Many parents come to me feeling exhausted and at their wit’s end.
With the right guidance, you can reclaim your evenings, help your child get the rest they need, and create a happier, healthier household.
I can help you reclaim those evenings and lost hours of sleep!
“We came to Sarah to overcome our highly sensitive daughter’s sleep issues and anxiety falling asleep alone.
Sarah grasped the issue straight away and the journey we have been through with her has been amazing. Our daughter is finally sleeping on her own and even managed a school trip to France!
We no longer have to spend our evenings laying with her and there’s been a huge improvement in our daughter’s confidence.”
Want to find out how I could help you?
Drop me a line…
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“I felt like I’d struck gold when I found Sarah! She understood, where most others have never even heard of high sensitivity.
What surprised me the most was learning that my son was not trying to manipulate me. This was invaluable information and we now have a calmer household with better routines and transitions - benefitting us all!”